Today I wore my Captain America sweatshirt to school
And when I went in the cafeteria I saw a classmate wearing a weird red and yellow jacket. I was looking at it for a bit and then I realized
it’s a fucking Iron Man jacket
So I put up my hood and run across the room to him, shouting, “Tony!” and hug him really hard and he”s confused at first but then sees my jacket and shouts “Cap!”
best. day. ever.
Guys, let me tell you about orcas.
Orca whales are mean motherfuckers. They cruise the oceans with only two things in mind: one, having sex, and two, eating every poor fuck they find out there that’s smaller than them. They are such badass motherfuckers that even great white motherfucking sharks don’t dare fuck with them, which in my books, places them above the sperm whale as Biggest Badass of the Ocean. And why don’t sharks bother them, you may wonder? Because orcas fucking learned that if you flip a shark over they go into a sort of coma, so now they do it intentionally so they can eat the motherfucking sharks. Not only that, but orcas have also learned how to hunt sperm whales and motherfucking sea birds.
The orca whale lives in a matriarchal pod. Every pod has unique hunting methods and whatnot, which is passed down from parent to offspring- these scary fuckers have formed civilizations. And what do they do for fun, apart from hopping around on the water’s surface and grinning like crazy mofos? They hunt for fun, going so far as to tip over ice floes and beach themselves just for the thrill of killing.
Now, I know what you’re thinking. Orca whales are too damn cute and smiley looking to be heartless predators of the sea. Well, let me counter-argue with this photo:
THOSE ARE NOT THE TEETH OF A CREATURE THAT WANTS TO BE YOUR FRIEND.
Greatest plot twist to Monster’s Inc.
oh my god you know what i just realized? all of the doors in monster’s inc. are “bigger on the inside”. so if any of the monsters went through this door they wouldn’t think anything of it. and the doctor would be standing there, smiling, waiting for them to say it, but of course it would make no difference to them.
I WASTED A WHOLE DAMN YEAR ON THE INTERNET
Here’s to 2013 where I’ll surely do it again
Don’t we have something going on this week?
move your finger back and forth so it looks like the cat is following it
This is more entertaining than it should be.
Owls confirmed to be the creepiest birds ever. LOOK AT THE FUCKING THINGS. If you fail to notice the one on the left fucking SWALLOWING a rat, then you have the dude singing some satanic chant or something next to him, and then you have those two other fucking psychos synchronized to make you feel creeped the fuck out with their soulless dance of FUCKING DOOM.
I really am tempted to reblog this every time it’s on my dash. That description is one of the best things on the internet.
Kaycee, I reblogged this for you! XD